My mother has a message for you. Breathe!
Breathing exercises to effectively settle public speaking anxiety.
My mother was famous throughout our family for her one stop cure-all. It didn't matter what the situation was, her first response was always a command.
As a child when I discovered my beloved cat squashed dead on the road, and ran to her screaming, she took me by the shoulders and said, "Breathe!"
My brother and I used to quarrel. When the door slamming, stomping, and shouting had given way to sobbing her first word to either of us was, "Breathe!"
I remember turning to stone through fear while standing in the wings of a stage, unable to move on my cue. Her remedy? "Breathe!"
Breathing. The Vietnamese Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh teaches:
“Whenever we feel carried away, or sunken in a deep emotion, or scattered in worries and projects, we return to our breathing to collect and anchor our mind.”
My Mother and he are in agreement. Good breathing is essential for well-being.
Take a good deep breath
Here's the paradox. When we are tense, under pressure, and anxious one of the first things we unconsciously do is hold our breath, breathe irregularly, and off the top of our lungs. (That is, we breathe very shallowly - not using their full capacity.)
Breathing like that increases tension and anxiety which in turn effects our voices.
Under stress they become weakened in volume, strained in tone and higher pitched. Words may flow less fluently, be mumbled and less distinct. Speech is too fast, too slow, and littered with "ums", "ahs" and "likes".
If left unchallenged poor breathing and poor speaking unite in an ongoing vicious circle - each enabling and strengthening the other.
The very first place to begin dismantling whatever tension you experience though speaking in public, is breathing well.
Getting rid of tension before it takes hold
Here's a simple exercise that you can do anywhere.
Use it when you realize you are starting to do the things you normally do when you're under stress: bite your nails, check everything for the umpteenth time, gabble, or snap at people without provocation.
Stand with your feet a comfortable shoulder width apart.
Support the weight of your body through your hips and legs rather than locking your knees.
Consciously release and relax your shoulders.
If you're holding your stomach in, let it go.
Place your hands on your stomach.
Breathe in through your nose to the count of four. Count slowly. As you inhale feel your diaphragm rising.
Breathe out through your mouth to the count of four and now feel your diaphragm expanding.
Do three rounds of inhaling and exhaling while making sure you keep your shoulders, stomach and legs relaxed.
You'll find when you're through you will be calmer, alert and able to think and speak more clearly.
If you routinely find yourself dealing with the side effects of public speaking nerves, please try this exercise. Your voice will be better, stronger, more resonant and flexible. You'll control your speech rate more easily and more effectively, AND you'll feel more confident.
There are variations on it, as well as links to more here: Breathing exercises to combat anxiety. (They’re good for children too.)
As my mother would say, breathe!
That’s it for this week. Thank you for joining my newsletter list and thank you reading it. ☺
I hope the world is treating you and yours kindly.
Susan
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